My Solitude To Whom I Belong: Poem

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My Solitude, To Whom I Belong

My solitude to whom I belong

Like a  love that is both fragile and strong.

My solitude, fine and fire-ridden

Came at twilight, unbidden.

 

Impossible to keep you at bay.

You just could not stay away.

You became mine, in spite of it all.

Ah, I did not even have to call.

 

I have felt your shadow merge with mine.

I have felt your footsteps echo my own.

Sometimes at twlight I heard your voice.

At times I would almost rejoice.

 

There were moments in strange cities

On frozen pavements, along grey seas

Under dripping skies, angular beautiful trees

My solitude would seek to please.

 

Ah, my solitude to whom I belong

Tells me there is no right or wrong;

Tells me I am not alone, but strong.

Then sings to me in a soft, low song.

 

Copyright: Rani Turton

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When I Am Alone: Poem

When I Am Alone

When I am alone, not troubled by extraneous grief;
nor substantial melancholy. Surrounded by birdsong
Not troubled by bitter pain, as children
Run back and forth with cricket bats
And women with babies look athe world
With serenity and trust; as the sun gently
Goes down and birds fly back to their nests
As I am alone in different climes and wonder
If I have got used to solitude or is it just that
Solitude has gotten used to me.

When I am alone, not troubled by extraneous grief;
The breeze is like a soft caress on my cheek.
I am alone, I watch the river flow:
I watch this solitude, and all that I know.

Copyright: Rani Turton
 

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Uncertain: Poem

Uncertain

I am not so sure anymore
Not so certain that it can work;
Life that was once, so simple and straight
Has turned into vast, complicated fate.

I analysed in pondering might:
My mind was strong and fine;
But sudden darkness eclipsed the light.
Thus my fine mind took flight.

Then with rocky imperfect rhymes
I wanted to mingle with the mist,
Strange melancholy and the rain:
Forget those years of struggle and pain.

Now night has come softly.
The time to wander, and try to unravel
The skeins of destiny’s plan,
From before, now, and how it began.

Copyright (text and image): Rani Turton

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Oh, Melancholy: Poem

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Oh, Melancholy

You almost tempted me

On wet city streets, in grey city nights

To trust uncaring strangers

Yes, those city knights.

 

Oh, Melancholy, you are my love

I have walked, talked and sung to you;

Years and years have gone by.

Melancholy: I was savage and shy.

 

One day I waited near the river

I saw you pass by on the bridge.

You were all I had ever dreamed of

Me, walking on the river’s edge.

 

I almost lost, ever in love, but

Never, never really wise;

Lost in romantic dreams,

I wished to believe in your passionate lies.

 

When I saw you walking by

On the bridge, your face in shadow

I knew then, you would always

Follow me, go where I go.

 

Touch me with soft, gentle hands

And often take my pain

Letting me believe that

You could dissolve it in the city rain

 

That you would speak to me

And I would for once understand:

My emotions would surge

As we walked on hand in hand.

 

Years later now, I still have you

In every shadow, mirror, poetic line

Oh, melancholy, you know

You will always be mine, only mine

 

Copyright: Rani Turton

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Filed under Angst, Existential poetry, Poem, psychological poetry

Ideas, Ideals And Delusions

Ideas, ideals And Delusions

I have some notions of nothingness
I have some ideals of illusions
Into the abyss then with these thoughts
My ideas, ideals and delusions.

I can sweep away those cob-webbed dreams
Wipe clean every troublesome image
But nothing, nothing ever again
Can help me really turn the page

There are persistant and resistant matters
That will come back like a boomerang
Like a half-latched door in a tempest
That will continue to maddeningly bang

Away then and into the vast starry night
I will somehow continue to live;
My ideals of illusions, my dreams of delusions
Can also help to make me survive.

Copyright: Rani Turton

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Filed under Angst, Existential poetry, Poem, psychological poetry

My Solitary Self: Poem

My Solitary Self

I asked my solitary self, shy, splendid and sad
What to do wth the rest of my life;
My solitary self, debating with being and existing
And  unravelling sundry strife.

My solitary self, aloof at times
Decided to ask my soul when and where
My brain and body could join in
And finally all griefs to share.

Wisdom, wherever it lies,
Perplexed by this intellectual discussion
Asked my solitary self to flee
All complicated abnegation.

So, alone with my solitary self,
Again I let my mind wander winsome and wild;
Slowly walking on mile after mile:
And then I saw my solitary self smile.

Copyright: Rani Turton

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Filed under Existential poetry, Poem, psychological poetry